Lately, my essays have been tapering off. Rob is almost back to normal after his kidney stone surgery. So grateful to my sister for driving down from Pennsylvania to Atlanta. She has been our fairy godmother, for sure!

One big treat was that she went to The Jerusalem Market and came home with a huge array of their specialty desserts. She also brought home a meal, but the desserts were my favorite.

If anyone wants to have me write on a certain topic, let me know. I sense that my blog may be coming to its inevitable end. This brings up the quote from Casablanca, “Here’s lookin at you, kid.” And by that I mean my readers. Some of us go back decades now.

None of us remember how important it is to do our inner work, our energy work. And should we stop doing it, our world would be much less fulfilling. What I mean by that is that we are sleeping human beings. To remember yourself “always and everywhere” is the basis of The Work.

So with a wink and a nod, I close this brief note, knowing that there are still more notes to write, just not as regularly, perhaps.

Vicki Woodyard

The world and its violence is within. Of course, we will deny that. Human beings are not a highly evolved species. If you think otherwise, you are sound asleep. Be sure that you will get a wakeup call, whether you have requested one or not.

These days the wakeup calls are becoming more frequent as fires and floods become the new norm.

I am living in a comfortable home, whereas others are dying of war and famine.

There is nothing to be done about this except to realize the Self in all beings.

Power is used to complicate things; surrender is used to simply see.

Love, your neighbor IS yourself.

Vicki Woodyard

The Work

The esoteric Work of Gurdjieff is hidden from the masses. It cannot be otherwise. I found it because my mother had found it. I seized on her books with an unbridled hunger, which continues to this day. Every essay I ever wrote came from Work energy arising within me.

Why is it hidden? Because, as Jesus said, it would be trampled. You cannot offer it to anyone who does not want it. Think “pearls before swine,” and you will understand.

The New Testament is esoteric spirituality if it is read consciously and not mechanically.

Of course the truth arose in Buddha and other eastern teachers.

It is a tiny trickle you can only absorb one breath at a time. It takes patience and fortitude to come to know yourself as the Self. And we quickly forget that we know.

Vernon Howard was teaching the truth when I studied him a long time ago. He was a severe
teacher and that never bothered me. I was that hungry.

After his death he came to me in a dream and said, “Don’t be so accommodating. Act a little tough.” And in the dream we were walking in Vinings, a nearby community from where I live. And I got the implication there, because Jesus said that He was the true vine. And so I pass on what I have garnered over the decades.

Most people are not hungry enough for truth; they are content with the surface and not the depths. It has ever been thus.

Vicki Woodyard

Dear Friends,

Things seem to be changing a bit for me as I enter through the portal of my eighties. I have been writing to you for many years and through many trials. This has been my earthly assignment, perhaps. While I am jam-packed with foibles, I nevertheless, am under the watchful eye of the Universal Force.

I will be writing more essays, but maybe not on a daily basis. I am surprise you haven’t tired of me already 😉

Please send good energy for Rob, who has a second kidney stone removal on Thursday. God bless my sister, who is driving down from Pennsylvania to be with Rob.

All eyes are on the upcoming Presidential election. Will we stand tall in the eyes of the world or will evil prevail here in our beloved country? No matter the outcome, each of us have their inner work to do if called to the path of awakening.

May we persevere in the higher way, which consists of many trials, but is ultimately worth it.

Love to all,
Vicki Woodyard

Have you ever seen through yourself, really? Because most of us haven’t and don’t want to. I was led to Vernon Howard many years ago and was led by my dreams to continue studying truth with a capital “T.”

He used have a sign over his door. “When the pain gets too bad, come back.” I am not so young anymore. Vernon died at the age of 73 and his words continue to flower somewhere in my soul. His words were scalding to the ego and he pushed people away that couldn’t bear to see themselves.

Now I remember suddenly that all of us are lying about everything. You see, this is the social predicament that human beings are in.

Society requires your lies to keep going.

I have never been a part of any social structure that meant anything. It would be impossible for me.

I have studied, read and wept at my own disavowal of truth. Remember how the disciples disavowed Christ? “Yeah, that is just apocryphal,” you say, and blindly go on your way.

No, it is literal. That is why many are called and few are chosen.

I choose to be chosen. Take that literally or figuratively. Those five words are your tickets out of hell.

Hell is to be asleep. Heaven is to die and reborn in such a humility that it is blinding.

What a relief to catch yourself in a lie, because then you realize that all of us are lying.

Phew. I keep forgetting. God help me to remember what needs to be remembered.

Vicki Woodyard

A Radical Insight

Thought can never return to the Father’s House….Vicki Woodyard

When you get to be my age, every day is a “wonder,” as in “I wonder where I put my glasses?” There is a big question mark around everything these days. As I started this essay, I had to see what today’s date is. Not surprisingly, I was surprised to find out that today is June 2, 2024.

Okay, I do get more easily confused and my desk is more littered, but that is to be expected and accepted. I am moving into self-acceptance as I bump into the sharp corners of reality.

My friend Tami always advises waiting for the shift. I think that is akin to waiting until all the evidence of something is proven beyond a reasonable doubt, to use a legal term.

For example, I jump to conclusions a lot. Sometimes I can leap tall tales in a single bound. How ‘bout them apples?

I am decidedly too old to get my knickers in a knot about where my glasses are. Too old to argue the finer points of enlightenment, too old to do what I don’t necessarily have to do.

“Being” is the new” doing.”

All my life I have been a perfectionist and that is living in a toxic state. No one cares if I mess up; it is a self-inflicted penalty.

Instead, I will take the road less paved and head out for my own inner journey back to who I really am. And of course I will lose my glasses along the way.

Progress is waiting for the shift. Getting out of my own way and enjoying the shift from self-judgment to self-acceptance. Above me and below me, heaven awaits me if I wait for the shift.
No more shift hitting the fan.

Vicki Woodyard

It is fun to dance across the white page tapping letters that make words that make meaning. Been doing this for so long that my tap shoes have worn out.

Things come and go but your life can hold it all. It’s magic the way that the soul adjusts to its hardships.

Hardships make a person.

Persons grow gracefully and slowly like a tree.

Do you feel yourself growing in the mist and midst of your hardships?

I have hardly been present in some decades. Wasting my time suffering mechanically.

This is the secret of life: Suffer consciously.

Light pours inside your body/mind.

NO is your magic word. It erases what hurts you.

YES results from the NO.

Figure it out or remain trapped in darkness.

The light is coming fro the inside now.

Amen.

Vicki Woodyard

THE DANCE

I have now seen my family doctor, my dermatologist’s P.A. and an orthopedic P.A. Last night I did not sleep a wink. This morning I feel fine. The older you get, the less sleep you need.

The downside is figuring out what to do at two a.m. I know you’re supposed to get up, but I end up tossing and turning instead.

As long as I have been writing on a Mac, there are still things about it that I “accidentally” access. Today it was that feature where many pages open up if you click on them. I found myself reading stuff I wrote many years ago. I haven’t changed my writing style a bit. It is what it is, as the old saying goes. It is a mix of tragedy and comedy, perhaps.

Today Rob and I were in the kitchen. I was at the table and he was standing there in his running shorts. I retold a few stories about his dad when he was young. Like the time in first grade that he wet his pants at recess. He casually put on his coat and sat back down at his desk. The teacher asked him why he had his coat on and his reply was that it was “raining out there.”

I think I should return to my website, which is where my writing is “parked.” Right now, I have the notice about closing it down. But I will post this essay on the blog again, since it is prepaid for a year.

I know that a handful of you will be glad. And in the other hand, I have a piece of chocolate.

Thank you for reading me all these years. I shall be in and out here and on Facebook.

Vicki Woodyard