As If….
Writing, for me, has always been an experience of flying by the seat of my pants. I haven’t written an essay in a while and here is the thing that hit me in the eye while I was lying down with burning eyes!
Vernon Howard gave a talk once that I have never forgotten. In a nutshell, this man met a teacher on a mountain one day and they met again for, let’s say about thirty days, and then suddenly he didn’t see the teacher anymore. Gone, vamoosed, just like that!
Vernon’s voice became louder (or that is how I remember it) as he yelled, “No mountain, no student, no teacher!” And as usual he glared at us as if we were beyond help.
Some forty years later and this time it hits me right between my poor eyes. At some point the opposites disappear and there literally is “no one typing this for someone else to read.” It’s all been a foolish, impossible game of trying to become enlightened.
I have grown old in the search for truth, prayers did no good, logic did no good, the very best teacher in the world did no good. I remained caught between a rock and a hard spot, trying my best to “get it.”
Vernon had a good gig for a long time. He knew that we would never get it. That is the nature of the opposites. He kept playing the role of an old curmudgeon yelling at his stupid students.
I have been baking frozen chocolate chip cookies while I typed this essay. They sure smell good, almost as if they were real.
Vicki Woodyard
P.S.
I am going to try again to post on the blog.
Love,
Vicki Woodyard