This is your life….

One of the first things that I learned from Vernon Howard is that this is YOUR life and it must be dedicating to waking up. He knew that he was speaking to unconscious people, so he spoke to us in his lectures with seriousness and depth.

It was an experience in discomfort to sit and listen to him drilling down into the depths of the human psyche. I knew that I was his student, having had a dream of traveling to the desert and being shown a protected classroom there.

When all of the teachings have fallen away, there is only the One and you are it. No one to learn from, no one to blame or excoriate, no decisions to be made, just mere being. And don’t say you always knew that; you didn’t. There is no more “you.” There is only “I am.” Then the will of God is your will. You and I will forget, yet the “I am” cannot be uprooted by the fragile ego.

Vernon Howard knew that the ego is a hard nut to crack and he hammered that truth into our heads. I was deeply serious about following The Work, as it was called in the days of Gurdjieff.

We are not interested in psychological interpretations, but in esoteric ones.

Vernon taught the Work in weekly talks geared to make us uncomfortable.

My own notes are peppered in teachings of The work as I understand it to be. We are not trying to please other people or become intellectually deep. We are here to witness our inner and outer life.

So tomorrow’s essay will be a mystery to both you and me. I am not channeling; I am simply doing what I can with the gift that I have been given.

Vicki Woodyard