A Large Angel
I had a long rambling dream in which I was with Rachel Maddow. I feel that in the dream she symbolizes the search for truth in the world. She talked at great length about her process; it seems her mind is busy and she remembers everything.
At some point in the dream she left and I continued walking with a rather plump ordinary person. I told her about losing my daughter. I don’t remember what I said, but, in essence, I told her that the silence helped me more than words.
I have taken the road not taken, and I’m not sure what that means. I do know that socially I have had no choice but to take it.
“Rest in the void. The void takes care of its own.” This is an eastern teaching that most westerners are unfamiliar with. You see, the familiar drapes our true nature in lies and deceptions. This is called “having a full life.” But emptiness is fullness for some of us.
My writing is about finding rest in a restless world. I am not sure how this is helpful to me, but it is. Every day offers me peace or chatter and I hate chatter.
It is about coming clean and telling you that I have no social life. I go through each day as best I can, attending to what life demands of me. But I rest naturally in the silence.
Some people have seen a large angel with me, although I am not gifted in seeing. But I trust what they said. It is probably this angel that is doing the writing.
The mind plays the role of the devil, always tempting me to leave the silence and “get busy.” And what is worse, I fall prey to it. It is a good thing that I have this angel always with me. Selah.