I find myself working through emotional issues. This is my lifelong pattern—to feel ashamed and want to hide. You see, we are all children inside. Parts of us have never grown up or have been damaged beyond repair. That is not being negative; that is telling the truth.

So the first step is for me to admit that I am feeling ashamed. This is called waking up. It is not enlightenment, which is an empty word for me. No, it is my lower self admitting that I need help from my higher self.

I already feel better for doing the work of Self-Remembering, as taught by Gurdjieff and carried on by Vernon Howard.

I remember that I have a True Self and a False Self. The True Self is the answer to all of our problems. Because I have to rise above duality, it is a difficult but necessary step to take.

So now I am above my ego looking down on it. You can call her Vicki; I do. Why is she so ashamed? What happened to her before she knew about how life can drag you down? She is still her, that little Vicki child, and she needs my help.

This is a process alone to the Alone and it must be repeated as often as necessary. It is the mustard seed of awakening to the Absolute within.

I do not have to cave in to remorse and regret. Higher consciousness removes them as soon as I remember the Self that I am.

Vicki is a writer but she is also a very human being. No one has it made. No one wins a prize.

Emptiness is the answer. Rest in the Void. The Void takes care of its own.

Selah.

Vicki Woodyard