It is a privilege to be awake in the moment, aware of how deep your fear of life runs. Oh, yes, we fear life almost as much as we fear death. It is easy for me to say that because I have been living with anxiety since I was 13 years old and had my first panic attack. This turned into agoraphobia, which lasted for decades. Now all that remains is social anxiety. Whew! You see, I am getting better at being who I truly am, warts and all.

I gently suggest that is what enlightenment is, in the last analysis. I have seen through “the enlightened beings” pontificating online. They, too, are enjoying the privilege of being awake to just how bad off they are, if they should ever admit it. But then they wouldn’t be able to sell books about how to become enlightened like they are.

Life is “just one damned thing after another.” Today I am saddled with neuropathy and am limited to what I can do. But I am also free to be alone and happy about that. There are no more social rules for me and I see that no one cares about anything but themselves and those closest to them and that’s okay!

There are so many myths about enlightenment that have to be seen through before you can truly appreciate your situation for what it is: an ever-changing landscape of The Lost and Found. For when we are lost, we are found, and only then. We are not just a solitary mitten in a box at school. We are the universe!

Never mind how isolated or alone we might feel. Those playing the role of social beings are just as lost as anyone else. In solitude we find ourselves, not in group consciousness. This is not elementary school but an ever-evolving situation of being neither lost nor found.

We simply ARE the universal consciousness contained in these frail little bodies.
Vernon Howard once said that we are a part of Mars and when we know that, we are humbled by it.

I guess that’s enough for today. No one is coming to save you, by the way. You are already home inside yourself!

Vicki Woodyard