I read a wonderful quote from Leonard Cohen in which he said that he wrote about his life knowing that the personal conveyed the impersonal, in so many words. I have always written about the most intimate parts of my life and they do mirror the universal, so I know what he means. “We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” Yep, that’s right. Let’s bring it down to the ego and how wrong it is. All it knows how to do is cover its fanny, hoping that no one sees through what they are doing.

My life is now in its final quarter and no one is winning or losing. Life just keeps ticking along, acting as if clock time were permanent. Wrong! Clocks break and so do people. So do governments, traditions and institutions. Families break as well. My son and I are down to the two of us and we have trouble getting along. Not always, just when I play the TV too loud and he continually rearranges items on the pantry shelf.

The peace I feel comes when I stop fiddling with the knobs of my life and just admit that nothing I can do changes anything of importance. Surrender is where peace begins and ends. Let it be.

I wish I could say that letting go works for very long; it doesn’t. Eternal vigilance is required. I keep thinking of this dream I had decades ago. An American Indian told me that there would be years of rain followed by an ice age. I believe this will happen and this is just the end of something and the beginning of something that will erase all life on this planet. It has happened countless times before.

It is said in the Work that esoteric teachings are saved in the ark and will be sown again when the floods are over and life begins anew. That is probably true, but it means little to me today. Today I must live the best life I can and that is being true to myself. Nothing else matters, really. For if we were all true to ourselves (our essence), things would be much better.

It must be said, however, that evil has no intention in vanishing. It perpetuates itself just as goodness does. “For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.” Romans 8:19.

But let us return to the living moment, which is happening whether we want it to be good or bad. The living moment cannot be controlled, only witnessed. Human beings want their lives to be good but they do the bad. Forgiveness is essential. Love is a result of that. Love conquers all.

Being silly and doing things that perk you up should be encouraged. I like coffee and sweets, my new smart TV and just sitting around doing nothing. This essay arises as easily as the next breath; it keeps me going.

Vicki Woodyard