Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea (Bonus Essay)


We have a nice little group assembled here whenever I post a new essay; for this I am most grateful! Writing for so long has given me a sensitivity to what readers respond to and why.

Those of us who have been online for many years now have figured out that discussion groups are not all that they are cracked up to be. The loudest and most annoying people are generally the ones that get all of the attention. I know, for I have been on the receiving end of such individuals.

So this group is a microcosm of the macrocosm, at least when it comes to spirituality.

I write very specifically on the same subject: How I really feel! So this little group of people often feels the same way and that draws us close to the hearth of the Heart. Now you know where “heartwarming” came from. I kid; I have no idea.

So how do I feel and how do I know that you feel much the same way? By vibes. Spirituality comes down to that.

Whenever I have had to attend a lecture, I have always gotten antsy, for lectures are intended to reach the mind. But the mind gets in the way of the heart all-too-often, doesn’t it?

Lately I have been writing about what I always write about, that something or other that makes me curious about why I am such a solitary.

I truly have never enjoyed the social scene, with the exception of being in a Tai Chi class or attending a kirtan. Given my health situation, I am no longer going to either one. I do quite well without any social interaction. But when I get comments from you saying you liked what I wrote, that is music to my ears.

The heart knows its own and the heart finds itself at odds with an increasingly evil world. When Vernon Howard used the word “evil,” he meant mechanical, running on and on without any self-knowledge.

Our job as students is to notice every thought and emotion. This requires a bit of consciousness, which is quickly lost. But if we do it year in and year out, we build up a reserve of conscious energy that can serve us well.

By the time that this has happened, we have already left the world. But how do we live when we know that there is no free will? That is our daily dilemma. I think I shall stop here, right between the devil and the deep blue sea! I must go and find my raft….

Vicki Woodyard

6 Comments

  1. This was posted tomorrow, but since I’m still stuck in today, I’m wondering how I’m seeing it. I’m not sure if I ever enjoyed the social scene, although I jumped into it fairly regularly when I was a pup. I’d leave early though, or get wasted enough to feel like something fun was happening, or sit on the couch by myself and wait for someone to sit down and talk to me. As I got older, it became a thing for me where I knew going in that it was going to be not fun at all if I tried to pretend I was feeling anything other than what I was feeling. I found that at times, just letting myself feel my whatevers in the middle of the scene, someone would key into it and be interested in the quiet person by the food table.

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    1. The time warp you speak of is warping my body! Now I have a hole in my mouth where a tooth used to be. Good thing it can’t be seen, huh? If I were the quiet person by the food table, I would be eating, so no loss.

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  2. The planned social scene never lived up to the hype for me. It is an energy sucker. I always felt/feel drained after a somewhat lengthy encounter. I have even been called the life if the party, but it took it’s toll. Small chit chat in the checkout line can change circumstances…alter timelines…spark ideas in someone unintended or just steal energy. Sometimes I avoid it and sometimes I partake in it. Like you said Vicki; it’s about the vibe.

    Another thought provoking essay…well done!

    Tami

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    1. Vernon said to be polite to grocery checkers, for example, but notice when you want them to like you, if only for that minute when they are checkiing your groceries out.

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