I have deeply enjoyed my break from my blog and Facebook. The silence has fed me more than words can ever do. I have taken care of things that needed doing, like getting tree work done in my yard.

Diagnosed with peripheral neuropathy in May, I am learning to live within limits. For the most part, nerve pain occurs at night, so I am on medication that relieves it almost totally. And I am starting some physical therapy tomorrow. I can’t walk as much as I used to do because I have nerve pain in my feet. That means muscles get weak, hence one reason for physical therapy.

I had a dream in which Bernie Siegel was giving me some advice about treatment. I had undergone a test that was painful and I saw Bernie eating ice cream. I put a spoon in his ice cream and ate some of it. I emailed and asked him what the thought the dream meant. In his
“no caps” typing style he wrote:

“eliminate what is causing you heat and pressure in your life
what will help you may be difficult for you to do because of how you feel about it
you can go for what tastes good for yourself
say no to tests you don’t feel good doing free of guilt
pain is to protect you”

So I am now focusing on doing only what I want to do when I want to do it. Not that I don’t already do that. I just need to up the dosage!

I have already said no to a couple of tests that a urologist recommended. I made an appointment for the first one and then realized I didn’t want it, so I called up and cancelled it.

Freedom comes in both small bites and big ones. I tend to like the smaller ones the best. I have thought about putting my house up for sale and I went so far as to email a realtor. Then I chickened out and wrote her back. “I don’t think I can do it,” I said. So she has suggested a meeting at the end of the month with no strings attached and I may do that.

I have had enough strings attached to me to be an electric guitar in a rock band!

Vicki Woodyard