No pundit has ever said a word that has made sense to me. If that sounds like an extreme sentence, it is.
I am still waiting for the cell door to open so I can walk out as a free human being.
I hear verbiage; I absorb content, but the soul awaits true freedom.
Some of you know exactly what I mean. The pundits are off the mark in one way or another.
The wannabes tout this or that teacher or teaching but my soul cannot make sense out of any of it.
This leaves me learning from the negative.
Enter Vernon Howard. He had the negativity that I needed and wanted. He said that “none of you has gotten it!” and I knew he was right.
I don’t get it.
When I do, I will let you know. Until then, learn from the negative. Know that you don’t know. Know that your life is impure and your motives questionable.
Know that bad decisions are second-nature to you and that nothing so far has healed you of your fear and anxiety.
There is something wonderful about seeing your failures close up and personal.
Tell that to the pundits but that might put them out of business.
Vicki Woodyard
Hi Vici, I would love for you to continue the youtube videos. It’s nice to have someone that knew Mr. Howard because it gives us newbies inspiration. I just recently found your Videos and enjoy them very much.
I sincerely admire you. As a writer, you have a very elegant and personal way of saying that is asequible, intimate, and deep at the same time. As a person, you are brilliant, hightly intelligent and spiritual. In my limited opinion, you are free.
I will share with you something that happened to me many years ago, when I began to meditate. I was seeing a wonderful light and I became very attached to it; it gave me a sense of peace and love totally unknown for me at that time, so I got really fond of meditation and I tried to sit and close my eyes as frequently as possible so I could feel that light… One day, a dark point appeared and began to grow. I was desperate. The darkness kept growing until I couldn’t see my light anymore. I realized that the darkness had the form of a door. It was a very big and heavy door and I was totally unable to move it. I began to cry. I wanted my light, I needed it, and all I could see was that horrible door… Then I heard a voice, a whisper coming from nowhere: “You are the door.” My first reaction was of denial, but the door was there, keeping me away from my beautifu light, so I tried to see what I could do with the “I am the door” information. I approached the door and tried to fuse with it, and it worked. Suddenly, I found myself at the other side, where the light was.
You are also the door. We all are… The pursue of awakening is just part of the dream, part of the door.
Lots of love, Vicky.
Thank you for this encouragement, dear Silvia. I treasure it.