So it’s almost the Fourth of July and the heat is peppered with sudden downpours. Men are digging holes in my front yard to install cables that will upgrade our electrical system. This has been going on forever, or so it would seem.
I had bad dreams the two or so hours I slept last night. This morning I am wandering the house feeling like I should be taking another step in downsizing. I look to my right and see a stack of books deemed “too heavy to move.” Let’s face it, books are not gonna do it if you are seeking peace on earth. Why? Because not only is it not in books, it is not found on earth. Those optimists who believe it possible have not studied history.
I have something going for me that is much better than history. It doesn’t even have a word and it is definitely not commercial. I was born with it and it covered itself over by the age of 13 in agoraphobia and panic attacks. It was the sacred secret, the supreme mystery. Of what I still do not know how to put into words.
Now that I am getting old, the covering has worn thin and the light is shining in darkness. The terrible secret I carried was that I KNEW. And yes, we all KNOW. And we somehow get the message that this must remain a secret. Because if you told, it would betray the purest part of you.
Some of you are nodding. Others are glad that I bring this up. We are one and many.
Vicki Woodyard
My personal experience with my years of downsizing is that is part of the process letting go of the false identity. My words to this so called self “I’m” not ready to let go of this or that because I remember when I got that or whatever the ‘memory’ is that is attached. I can tell you this, I feel lighter and freer with each thing I let go of especially the memories of the past.
I am ready to downsize; what I find difficult is the idea of the physical move, when I decide to put the house on the market.