There are all kinds of differentiating that we have to do subconsciously when we are with other people. And we cannot let this show or the play would end! You know what Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage.”

As I get older I find myself preferring my off-stage life! The people traipsing in and out are almost nonexistent now. I have time to be who I am.

There was a nice heavy rain this morning. I puttered around, trying to clean up my messy desk, a fruitless task.

After lunch, I sat with my favorite new book, “The Four Letters of Love,” by Niall Williams. He writes between the lines so beautifully and that is what happens with all of our human exchanges. We say the lines while differentiating to ourselves in silent code-breaking. This is what it means to be both human and cosmic. We cannot avoid either one.

We cannot be honest with people because humans would be wiped off the face of the earth if honesty prevailed. Society is a source of dishonesty fostered by the wish not to be killed.

I am not political in any sense of the word nor even religious. Spiritual? Yes, indeed. I cannot reveal this to anyone because roles do not recognize this category. Roles are mechanical and spirituality is conscious.

Gurdjieff spoke of this better than anyone else and made it quite unintelligible to the ego. Made it unpalatable and unnecessary to the masses.

That having been said, the few struggle to interpret the language of esoteric wholeness.

I know myself quite well. “To study the self is to study the way.” Vicki is one person and my spiritual self is quite another. Never the twain shall meet.

So I spend this day alone in great contentment. The rain has stopped and I can see clearly now. I would not describe what I see because it is a feeling of deep knowing. Life on stage becomes unnecessary.

Vicki Woodyard